Monday, June 16, 2008

Some Days Are A Little Messy


Some days are just a little messy whether it is due to a lack of organizational skills, a spilled drink, a ruined outfit, a hole in a pair of slacks (usually in a prominent place unbeknownst to the wearer), but we get through it.
One of the ways I am able to get through those messy days is through humor. In order to get this shot, I had to crawl on my belly - not such a bad thing unless your allergic to grass, trees, flowers, and anything else that grows outdoors.
Then there's the irony that I lack the ability to judge distance, can't see out of the corner of my eyes, and have severe night blindness, and knowing all this, where do I spend my time? Outdoors, of course.
True, I got a nice case of hives for the effort of grabbing this shot, but was reminded by this squirrel that I've named Messy Marvin that it's so easy to accidentally make a mess.
There are various types of messes: chaotic house with things all over the place (mine), a sloppy eater that tends to drip and drop food on the table or floor (sometimes me), and the kinds that are a little bit harder to clean up. Those are the ones that bother me most.
In social situations I tend to blurt out things I don't mean because I'm uncomfortable around several people - even if I know them. I'll chatter non-stop out of pure nervousness. Last time I went to a function, I asked somebody when their baby was due. Uh, she wasn't pregnant. How does one take back something like that?
I can recall when I was in high school (I was bolder then) and was sitting down to lunch. There was a girl sitting at the table in front of me and for some reason, I noticed her earrings. They were beautiful crosses. Not realizing I needed glasses then, I walked up to her, got in her face, looked hard at the earrings, then said, "I thought the crosses were upside down."
She probably thought I'd lost my mind; if I angered her, she didn't make a fuss out of it. Obviously, I lacked social graces. I guess I still do.
A few years ago I went to Italy. I ordered a pasta, and thinking it would be hot and filled with meatballs, I was shocked to not only find it cold, but filled with fish. I spat it out not realizing it was considered a real treat. I insulted the cook; they kindly directed me to an American eatery.
That same trip, I decided to wash my clothing out by hand in order to save money. That part was easy, and since the day was warm - and I had planned an afternoon of sight-seeing, I decided I'd hang the clothing over the balcony to air dry. I didn't take one thing into account: while I was gone, it suddenly turned windy. Many things blew away, including a few things I decided not to go looking for. Some things are easier just to replace in order to save face.
If that wasn't bad enough. One evening there was a beautiful sunset. Not wanting to let the bugs into my hotel, I shut the sliding glass door. An hour later, I decided to go back inside and that's when I discovered I was locked out.
Normally not such a big deal, but since I was on the third floor without a staircase, all I could do was shout out for help. To give you an idea of how loud I can be, it was the patrons ACROSS the street inside a bar that heard my cries: "Help, I've locked myself out and can't get in." For some reason, I was reminded of that horrible commercial 'help, I've fallen and can't get up."
A couple of men came out, looked up to see where the noise was coming from, and before they went for help, they literally fell down laughing.
In America, when one steps out onto a balcony and closes the sliding glass door, one expects to be able to walk back in. I tried to explain that to the clerk (who by the way was so kind), she could only laugh.
What made that experience worse was that I was due to leave early the following morning to return home. My thoughts were dismal, afraid I'd be left outside all night, miss my ride to the airport, miss my plane, and all kinds of other horrible things. I doubt I was screaming for more than a couple of minutes, but it felt like hours. It was one of those times when time seems to slow down and seconds feel like minutes.
When I finally left the hotel the following morning, I was told that they'd be bored because they wouldn't have to do anything work-wise. During my six days at that hotel, I got lost, locked myself out of my room, had my clothing blow away, lost my passport, insulted the favorite near by eatery, lost my key to my room, and those are only a few of the things that come to mind.
So, life can be a little messy, but somehow, we pull ourselves together and manage to make it through. Still, Messy Marvin not only reminded of 'regular messes' in our lives, but he made me hungry as well. I came home, cooled down, and ate a cookie.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Medicare and your opinion




As a person on disability, I believed that Medicare was far better than Medicaid, that I'd have more options, better service, and that doctors would be more willing to see me. How wrong I was.


Very few people know that I take medication on a daily basis; for seven years I've been stable. Night terrors decreased, depression wasn't so intense, and I even gained the courage to go back to school, earning both an undergraduate and a graduate degree. Sounds great, right?


There's a problem when a person has been disabled for a number of years. Now I'm overqualified for some jobs and lack experience on others. No problem, I'll just deal with them.


I planned on issues with starting a new business, but recently I went from SSI to SS. That meant my insurance changed; suddenly, I can't see the doctor who prescribes my maintenence medication, nobody else is taking new clients, and even my own personal medical doctor is reluctanct to give me the prescriptions that help me remain stable. Now I hear they want to increase premiums when services are already bad. How does increasing premiums help those who need medical attention?


What does one do when medication makes the difference between living among a normal society versus not being able to cope around other people? Medications are harder to get, being seen by a doctor is more difficult, and last, I've noticed a stigma attached when I hand over my insurance card. I'm willing to bet that receptionists aren't aware of the frown they wear when handed such cards.


Medical care is becoming increasingly difficult to obtain, and many, like me, have managed to keep it a secret that I need antidepressents or anti-anxiety medication - or even medication for night terrors. Some how, it doesn't come up in every day conversation...


I know promises are being made for the next election, but I'm tired or rhetoric...I want answers, solutions, or at least knowing that more than words are being said - let's have those promises put into action. I have since found out that some elderly have died because they couldn't afford medication - add that to the gas prices, and something has to give. What is the solution...actually, taking this to a new level, what is your take on this? If you had the power, what would you suggest???